Another Intellectual Being

Whats wrong with me?

Life seems so dreary and boring sometimes. I’m locked up in my house studying for my year backs and writing a term paper. You’re studying Engineering, People say; hence you have to work hard. I do work quite hard thank you. I tried the entire first semester to catch up with the studies, to be a good boy. Studying with full vigour and enthusiasm. A bunk once in a while with friends to see a random movie or relax. I made sure to catch up with the work the next day. Lots of good it did me. I got two backs, one each in Maths and Physics.

And I got a 4.5 pointer which is almost a failure in the word of engineering nerdness. I buckled up. Dad threatened me to study harder and that if I get another back he’d stop giving my fees. I was perturbed about it for exactly 48 hours. Then I forgot about it.

I had found the perfect company. A bandwagon of 5 guys. Ultimate fun. No one could have asked for more. I saw all of them getting involved with girls. Heck even I tried. Fell flat on my face as usual. Still we had oodles of fun. I made new friends, female friends too. The end result being 3 backs, debarred in 1 subject and 4 pointer. Could anything else go wrong?

Most of you must have seen me online on facebook 24*7. You must have even wondered once or twice. Is this guy really so useless? Doesn’t he have a life or friends? If truth be told, then yes I have a life, a rather rocking one. And I have so so many friends. Just none who live nearby enough to hang out with. Arpit lives in Ashok Vihar, Abhinav in Ghaziabad and Jeeshan’s in iffing Canada. What’s distance when it comes to wanting to have fun, eh? Well it does evidently matter when you always need a driver since you don’t know how to drive. But now I learnt to drive. I’ve been driving quite well but heck; no one lets me drive alone. What if I parked the car up a tree? What if I saw a pretty face on the road and got distracted? Excuses, excuses, excuses.

In reality I don’t really think I have any friends. I stay at home all day. Face glued to my laptop’s screen. I call myself a photographer but never really go out to shoot. Well it’s boring to be alone all the time. My mom says I’ve become a social outcast by socialising on facebook. I asked her if she’d let me go to a party. She said no. She even takes away my internet connection just because I’m online to long. Damn what does everybody want from me? Some say I don’t know humility; some call me desperate, some say I’m a retard. Damn am I really? How can you say that? How well do you know me anyway? Does anyone know me at all? Does anyone care? Questions, questions and even more questions. They never really get answered.

Guys give you importance if you know many girls. But girls never give any guy a fair chance. Unless, a) They are in dire need of help, b) They are bored or c) The guy looks like Adonis. But I guess the rate at which these girls are going. Even Adonis would be sitting at home. Crying in his mother’s lap. You go up to a girl and say hi and she’ll look at you as if you’ve just asked her to give you both of her kidneys. Ease up women. Just because we’re talking to you doesn’t mean we have wet dreams about you or want to make kids with you. And then if you’re nice with a girl, a few days later somebody would be bound to ask you if you have a crush on that girl. Just because you give someone a little attention doesn’t mean you’re head over heels in love with that person. Damn!

People are so possessed about the fact that somebody may like somebody. How the hell were you born? Did the stork bring you in? Special delivery? Everybody is so clueless these days. So much perturbed about things that shouldn’t be even thought about. What if I like a girl? What if I like every girl I meet? Is it really such a big deal? None of them ever liked me back so what good does it do anyway. Now if I dated every girl I met, now that would be very disapproving and disturbing. But heck I don’t even want to do that. I’d be very happy to be stuck with one girl all my life. Given that I atleast get along with her.

Oh and the funniest thing. I’ve seen girls go bonkers over a guy who I wouldn’t even call a guy. Shaved arms, shaved chest, eyebrows plucked, what the fudge? And the best is when they open their mouths and the beautiful uncultured language comes out. But hey that’s all cool. Girls don’t care about looks everything else. Only looks matters. So what if the guy can possibly ditch you after the first time you make love? So what if he makes mms clips of you making love and posts it online? So what if he dates 15 girls at the same time? So what if he disrespects your friends and family? So what if he embarrasses you in public? It’s all good as long as you can flaunt him in front of your other girl friends, with his mouth shut of course.

What girls find wrong with me is my weight. I love to eat, I’m lazy, I love watching movies and not doing stuff. Hey I’m the perfect guy aren’t I? I have the guts to be myself no matter how fucked up everything is, I have the sincerity to treat all people with respect. I by mistake have been taught to be nice to women, I again by mistake was taught never to wish bad for others. And you want to know how that’s helped me so far? I’M OFFICIALLY FUCKED UP!

Auf Wiedersehen. Chau. Sayonara. Adios. And Peace OUT.

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4 responses

  1. whoa!

    June 27, 2010 at 4:32 pm

  2. woah dude.. calm down..
    and welcome to the real world

    July 29, 2010 at 12:37 pm

  3. See dude.. I can see we are similar, except I’m younger than you 😛
    And what I’ve come to understand is that life isn’t perfect, the world isn’t perfect and girls aren’t perfect. You have to sacrifice.. get up your lazy ass once in a while and exercise.. leave that extra piece of chocolate, not watch that movie, stay away from facebook.. cuz that’s just how it is.. I love escapism more than anyone.. I love watching movies and staying online all day, but it can’t lead to anything good in my life.. I have to make it happen.. approach every girl I see so that I don’t fear rejection anymore cuz the truth is that good guys don’t win! looks do matter.. would you like to date a fugly girl? din’t think so.. you have to learn the rules of the game and apply them.. don’t expect to win when you are ignoring the rules..

    p.s. yeah, it really is easier to give other people advice. i don’t follow my advice either.. 😛 and I’m fucked up too!

    July 29, 2010 at 12:44 pm

    • Archisman

      Well this is random venting. Sometimes the steam builds up so much that you just gotta let it out. This was my way of doing it. 🙂

      July 30, 2010 at 6:27 pm

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